June 10, 2008

Booty Calls For Cancer Patients

Okay, I am a married, faithful woman, but I only met my husband three years ago and had cancer for four years before that. Dang there were some desperate times, hormones flying around out of control. Like a divining rod I was just searching for the wellspring all the time! Not like I had the energy (or interest) to be out clubbing or partying, so even a trip to the grocery store held the fantasy and hope of finding a flirtation in the produce aisle that could lead to who knows what.

I’ve spent the last few years interviewing 20/30’s with cancer for my book and in these private conversations we often go to the juicy topic of being desperate for sex during cancer. I was so raging with hormones once I called up a friend and asked what he though of the whole proposition of a mercy fuck. We were both totally up for it when he arrived at my apartment but we never went beyond kissing – it just wasn’t a good match.

It seems so many people out there in the world are all about volunteering for and donating to the cause. Wouldn’t it be great if there were a clean, caring, loving service that brought good looking volunteer cancer fuck fairies to your home or hospital bed? It would bring a whole new meaning to donating your body to science.

What do you think? Am I soon going to be sharing the company of Spitzer for even writing this?

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Comment(s)

  1. lisa f. Says:
    July 9th, 2008 at 6:11 PM

    hah! hysterical – i love it!X


  2. Dana Says:
    July 10th, 2008 at 3:38 PM

    ‘Cancer fuck fairies??’ Just when I thought you couldn’t get any funnier… BAM!

    I love it!


  3. Jennifer Says:
    July 17th, 2008 at 12:51 PM

    You are a genius.

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