October 23, 2009

Do You Know About Your Doc’s Private Life?


I injured my knee while napping on Wednesday.  (Who gets injured napping?)  Still super painful on Thursday, Shannon pushed me into my doctor’s office in a wheelchair.  The cause of the pain is still a mystery.  We joked with my doc that it’s H1N1 in my knee, or a very new and original manifestation of PMS.  He told me to ice, rest, pop Advil and check in with him on Monday when he gets back from vacation.

My doc’s going on vacation.  Well that’s what he said at first.  Then at the end of the appointment he said, “I’ll be back on Monday, it’s a simple procedure so I should be on my feet in no time.”  What?  He slipped up but obviously wanted me to think he was off to Tahiti not the OR.

The same day, I read on the New York Times Well Blog a post called ‘When Doctors Confide in Patients.’  They told about a young woman diagnosed with MS who worried out loud to her doc about not being able to have kids or work.  The doc confessed she was living with MS too, working as a doc and had kids.  It helped the patient so much to learn about the doc’s life.

I adore my primary care doc.  He’s probably my age and so easy to talk to.  He tells me anecdotes about his life in passing but I don’t have too many details.  Our relaxed conversations help our communication, which in turn improves my care.  But  there needs to be space.  If I knew too much about his life it could get in the way of him giving me appropriate care.  For example, would I be cool with him slacking off or slipping up if I knew he was just diagnosed with cancer last week?  As a patient, I should not be put in the position to have to make that decision.  I think my doc strikes the perfect balance with me of personal and private.  With docs, I think there is a fine line of TMI.

How much do you know about your doctors’ lives?  Do you like knowing about your doctor’s life, is it weird or ever too much information?

For tips on improving communication with your doctors read Everything Changes: The Insider’s Guide to Cancer in Your 20s and 30s.

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